Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Inadequate Parenting

It is snowy and gloomy here today. I a grumpy and the kids are grumpy. It's a recipe for disaster and our morning ended up being just that- a disaster! I let the kids watch a little too much TV because I was reading a book (I know, you envy my wonderful mothering skills, don't you?!). This makes them even grumpier. I had two mean, disobedient children and a grumpy mama. They weren't obeying and my patience wore thin. I ended up yelling at them and just totally losing my cool.

Thank God for nap time. I was able to confess my sins, inadequacies, and weaknesses and beg him for wisdom and strength. My two grumperoos were able to sleep. The truth is his mercies are new every morning AND every afternoon in our house;)

When the kids got up I sat them down and this was the conversation.

Me: Hey guys mom wants to talk to you for a minute.
Ava: I guess you didn't forget about that situation.
Me: What situation?
Ava: the one where you told us to clean up our stuff in the basement but we just made a bigger mess for you to clean up
Me: You are right. I didn't forget that, but I also didn't forget that I lost my temper and yelled at you guys.
Ava: I know and now you are going to apologize.
(let me interject here to say that when she said this I no longer wanted to apologize. I am still grumpy after all. I wanted to stick her butt back in her room, but alas...God helped me keep it together;)
Me: yes, I am sorry for yelling and ask your forgiveness, but I also want to talk about starting our day over right now. I am going to forgive you guys for your behavior, but starting right now- no sassy mouth from you, no ignoring mommy from Phin and I need obedience from both of you. It is my job to help you learn to obey and have hearts that honor God. I make mistakes and you do too, but God can help us all have better hearts. Mommy shouldn't have yelled, i should have stayed calm, but I SHOULD have corrected your behavior.
Ava: Okay Mom
Phin: Okay Mom- can we watch a show?

AYE...I think perhaps the only repentant heart is mine, but so far the afternoon has been a bit better. Parenting is hard. I feel terrible for yelling and am trying to think of good ways to discipline, especially this new sassy mouth and tattling thing Ava is doing. I sure hope my husband has some good wisdom to offer when he gets home. Right now I don't feel like I have it all together. I'm just praying God gives me wisdom- I feel completely inadequate! Anyone else ever have these kind of days?!


  1. I remember that "tattling phase." I finally put in a new rule - If they aren't broke, bleeding, or about to do something dangerous or something we have strictly forbidden I don't want to hear it. Granted mine were a bit older and calling me at work but something similar could work. I also had to make myself follow the rule as far as tattling to dad in their presence. I usually told him (when it was something funny or something that really bothered, or something I actually remembered) I just didn't tell in front of the kids. Aunt Judy

  2. Girl, I'm right there with you! This weather isn't doing anybody any favors! Arg!

  3. This describes my day yesterday to a T! But I didn't even apologize to the kiddos...

    Thanks for your honesty for its nice to know that I'm not the only one having days that sound like this! You are and continue to be a wonderful mom who has a huge heart :)