Friday, June 19, 2009

If it wasn't my life, I might not believe it...

Thanks for everyone who so kindly pointed out my incomplete blog entry from yesterday. I have a really funny list of "Have you ever?"s in my mind, but was unable to even type a single one before being interrupted by my children yesterday. I meant to save the post, but some how must have published it.

After attending a "Super Couponing" seminar yesterday with my frugal friend, Nicole (a seminar that was AMAZING FYI!), I came home attempting to correct my tarnished blog. I turned on my laptop and received a message that the computer was "unable to locate hard drive". I was sure it was some small, correctable error until my husband said, "NO! NO! NO! Don't do this to me!" and received "the blue screen of death" from our 6 month old laptop. Hopefully, the guys at Best Buy will retrieve our coveted files and thank God we always buy those warranties, cuz they'll give us a new laptop for free. But let's all admit this is a PAIN in the butt! The whole process will take a week or two. Annoying.

To top it all off, my son finally had a normal nights sleep last night (getting up only once) after a long week (he cut 5 teeth in 8 days- SERIOUSLY!), but my daughter was up. She was not only up, she was in our bed. I like to sleep in a good thunderstorm; three year olds, apparently, do not. She was afraid, I get that, we've all been a child who was afraid in the middle of the night, but once in my bed you'd think she'd be able to fall sleep. At the very least, could she be nice and lie still and PRETEND to fall asleep? NO! The rain and thunder were to noisy and she tossed and turned and tried to hug me. Why she had to share my half of the bed, instead of taking a third and allowing Marc to share too is beyond me. Why my husband could sleep soundly through it all is enough to make me...bite my tongue and be kind;) After an hour the rain stopped and I carried her back to bed. I had just fallen back to asleep, finally, when the storm once again reared it's nasty head. Really? Really? Ah yes- the joys of motherhood.

My daughter could have slept in, after all, she got no more sleep than I, but 6:30 came and she was bright eyed and rearin' to go.

We survived ballet and barely survived lunch out with friends (melt down from little miss sleepless). Phin fell asleep in the car within a minute or two and I was chattin' to Ava desperately trying to keep her awake because I NEEDED a nap as desperately as she. The dang expressway was not just slow due to continued torrential rains, it was stop and go, with way more stop than go. About 5 minutes into this excruciating crawl, my stomach became sick. I mean way sick. I was tearing up and there was no where to turn. I react strongly to certain fried foods, but at the ripe old age of 32 I know my triggers- usually. Apparently the fries at this place are fried in an oil I can't tolerate. I was SICK. I needed a bathroom STAT.

It was pouring rain, and I was stopped on an expressway. PANIC. I had no choice- I reached into my sons diaper bag and lined me undies in his size 5 pampers. Thankfully I did this without letting Ava see. Ava is potty trained within the last year and God forbid she realize that mommy is about to have an accident. That just can't happen. Oh my! It got worse and worse and yes, I pooped my pamper. It was horrible. I was almost crying- trying desperately to hold it together while Ava is saying, "something stinks" and against my principles I lied and told her my stomach was sick and I was sorry that my farts stunk. She bought it-

Needless to say it was a long horrible ride home. I crawled to the next exit and got off to take back roads home. I desperately chatted with Ava to keep her awake and sat in my own excrement. LOVELY!

I got home and when I opened the door, I thought the house smelled, but excused it I got my kids in bed and RAN to my bathroom to free myself of my hell. I took the best shower of my ENTIRE life and cried while I cleansed.

I went into the kitchen to get a much need Diet Coke and realized either I didn't wash well enough or the stench earlier noticed was of an origin other than myself. I quickly surmised it was coming from the basement and as I turned on the light to the stairs, I almost fainted. WATER.


We flooded once last summer and a years worth of blogging could not express the damage it did to our stuff, our pocketbooks, and our psyche! The problem was supposed to be fixed. ARGH!

I called the landlord and was forced to wait to survey the damage until his arrival as I don't own rubber boots and I am not settin' foot in water without knowing whether or not it is conducting electricity from some source or another.

I called my husband and sat down on the couch to breathe. Just as I inhaled I felt wet seeping through my drawers. This time- not my fault. My couch in the family room was soaked and all I had to do was look up to see that the skylight might as well have been an open convertible top. Leaking everywhere...WHAT?!

As I chatted and relayed my day to my friend, Dre and cancelled our afternoon play date, I looked down and to top it all off noticed a white spot under my toe nail. Now I don't know if it is anything, but because it has been a rough 24 hours, I am sure it must be a fungus or something. My nail is smooth and Dre tells me this can happen from wearing nail polish too much and it will
clear up after a little while left open to air. It better- otherwise I will freak out. I am just
imagining a gross growing fungus that distorts my beautiful feet (yes, I do like my feet).

I requested that my husband come home from work early. He agreed to do just that...after a 3:o0 meeting with the CEO. (It was 2:30 at the time, so it seemed reasonable.) You've guessed already, I am sure, that this turned out to LITERALLY be the LONGEST meeting of his life. He arrived home at 7pm. (I will pause here to let you know we traded funny sarcastic texts through out the meeting/waiting, which was a nice was to avoid being angry with HIM for something out of his control).

One can only laugh at such a day. Really it is ridiculous and hilarious and....OVER! Thank God. The water is already out of the basement and we'll check again tomorrow but it seems the steps we took after the last flood worked and nothing is ruined except the twelve pack of paper towels that was on the floor. Thank God we are healthy, my husband brought home pizza for dinner, and now we KNOW the sump pump isn't working properly, so tonight when the storm that is predicted comes through we can keep going down and resetting it. Sure that will mean we won't sleep, but with a storm and a three year old, we'll be up anyways.


  1. Um, wow Kim, you are so honest. Almost too honest!! I'm sitting here in disbelief reading this saying, "oh no, oh, no, oh NO!" And Greg is like, "What?" I couldn't tell him-nothing he needs to know about, but he said I can't react like that without telling him. I held my ground though.

    The wet vac is here for when you need it. greg will be home most of the day except from about 11:30-12:30 pm, well and after 4 pm, but the sitter will be here.

  2. yes TMI, to be sure, but had I left out the fact that I pooped my pants at 32, the day would not have seemed as horrible as it was; let's face it that was HORRIBLE! And know the whole world knows that I have no secrets and no shame...but remember "Everybody Poops" is not a children's book bestseller for no reason...