Thursday, February 12, 2015

Kimmy and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good Very Bad Day

I love the book Alexander and the Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day  it makes me laugh.  Our entire family enjoy the film by the same title.  Sometimes when everything is going wrong the best thing to do is laugh so I am dustin' off my computer keys and stretching my neglected blogging fingers to record this one for the history books.

Let me first say, my plan for the day was to clean my house because my birthday was the next day (today) and I wanted to wake up to a clean house and empty "to do" list.  Chloe and Christian had preschool, so I had a nice couple hours in the morning and then during nap to get it all done.  It was the makings of a productive, stress free day.

6:40 am- I received an email reply to a previous night's email.  I hadn't received any details on worship practice (which is abnormal) so I emailed the coordinator to see if I was still scheduled.  Her reply was "I didn't hear back from you so I wasn't sure what you were doing?"  I NEVER got her email.  I hate starting the day, feeling like someone thinks you ignored them and slacked off and really it was lost in some email black hole.
7:00am- Realize I have NOTHING for Phin's lunch.  Spend thirty minutes scraping together a lunch...a mismatch of crackers, baby bell cheese and some salami slices, canned peaches, and a granola bar.
7:30am- rushing out the door to get Ava and Phin to school and I remember it's everyone's library day, so I say, "Everyone has their library books, right?"  They all say, "yes".  I literally then think, "I think my Hashimoto's really is finally getting under control.  I cannot believe I remembered that without looking at my calendar.  Maybe the brain fog is finally improving."
8:15am- return home and sit down to grab breakfast and check my email.
8:25am- The phone rings and Ava is frantic because she has just learned the class Valentine's Party is at 2pm and we didn't do Valentine's yet.  WHAT?  Why is the class party on Wednesday?  I feel totally confused and it is 100% my fault.  The room mom sent an email asking people to sign up for food and sure enough it says 2pm Wednesday.  I guess I just figured parties are always at the end of the day before the holiday...lesson learned.
8:45am-Drop Chloe and Christian off at Preschool.
9:00am- Return home to put Ava's Valentines together and the phone rings almost immediately.  Apparently, I put Chloe's library folder in her bag, but her book isn't in her library folder.  We forgot her book last week so I needed to bring it back.
9:10am- I grab the Valentines and bubble tape to go with them, the library book and head out the door.
9:15am- Drop off Chloe's library book
9:30am- Run in Target to get the Marshmallows I have signed up to bring to Ava's class party.
9:50am- I sit in the parking lot at Ava's school, fill out all her Valentine's and tape the bubble tape on them.  Then take them inside.  The sweet secretary invites me to stay for chapel, where Ava is, and give her the Valentines when it is done.  How do you say, "no, I actually do not want to stay for Chapel?"  You just do.  I said, " I have one hour left with no kids, I love Jesus, but I don't want to stay for Chapel.  Can I please just leave these in her classroom?"  Ba ha ha...

I do an errand because running home is kind of a waste of time at this point.
11:30am- I pick up Chloe and Christian from School
11:40am- My cell phone rings, it is Phin's teacher.  She says, "Did you think Phin had hot lunch today?  We don't have him on the order, but he doesn't have a lunch?"  She probably was a bit caught off guard when I just started LAUGHING.  WHAT?!  I packed him a hodge podge lunch- where was it?!  It wasn't on the counter anymore!  She asked me to bring lunch.  Mind you I've already driven to their school TWICE and it's 20 minutes each way.  I told her I could come but it would be 20 minutes before I got there, plus I'd have to stop and pick up subway because we didn't have any lunch food left.  I found out lunch would be over before I got there and she said she'd hodge podge something together for him.
12:30pm- After lunch (Mac N Cheese if you are curious) for my preschoolers, I finally got them to nap and settle in for a good couple hours of chipping away at my "to do"s.  I probably don't have to even tell you that my little guy was a pill.  He almost always goes to nap easily...NOT THIS DAY.  Finally, his overtired grumpy self fell asleep.
2:30pm- I have to wake up Christian who is dead a sleep and crying hysterically that I woke him up.  I give him and Chloe candy to stop the tears (judge away, my friends, desperate times call for desperate measure).  I drive to school and think to myself, "WHY didn't I set up a play date for Phin?!"  See, Ava was going home with her friend Isabella (planned 2 weeks ago), which means I pick up Phin 20 minutes away at 3pm and return home only to pick up Ava at 5:15 the same direction but further 30 minutes away.  I need a taxi hat.
3:00pm pull into pick up line when Isabella's mom (Rachel is awesome and I totally love her) comes up to the car with my kids and says, "I was just here for the Valentine's party and Jake (a year older than Phin) doesn't have anyone coming over today.  He wants Phin to come too, would that be okay.  I started laughing...sure, why not...whatever.
3:30pm- back home putting laundry away and I realize I FORGOT THE DOG!  See, the day before I had dropped off Ollie at the dog daycare because I was going to be gone all day at my friend Christina's helping her unpack.  The problem was I got a flat tire and I couldn't pick him up before they closed, so I called and explained and they boarded him, but I was supposed to pick him up before noon...
4:30pm- head out, pick up Ollie, get charged for a second day of boarding.
5;15pm- pick up Ava and Phin, and get cluttered in crazy traffic so realize I have to feed my kids dinner in the car.  Mama is going to splurge and get Steak N Shake.  I mean have you ever had their Parmesan garlic fries.  That is some GOOD stress food.  I pull into the drive thru and I order a Steak Frank with ketchup only and those heavenly friend and food for my kids.  The drive thru takes forever.  I hand the kids back their food while driving home, sort of stressing that I will be late for worship practice (and she probably already thinks me a flake;).   It is dark, I grab some fries...THEY ARE NOT Parmesan garlic- they are plain.  Not even salty- PLAIN.  Argh.  I'm not going to wallow- I move on to the hot dog.  I bite into it...have you even drank or eaten something expecting something else?  That horrifying, "what is going on?" feeling when it isn't what you expect?  Yep, had that cuz my hot dog, which I ordered with KETCHUP only has on it MUSTARD only.  I start kids know I am crazy so they just laugh hysterically too.  We are a driving bunch of laughing hyena's.  They don't even know why we are laughing
6:00pm- we are just about home when sweet Chloe says, "These are the best fries ever."  NO!  It cannot be...I say, "Chloe Roberta, hand me one of those best fries ever please."  She happily shares....THEY ARE MY FRIES.  My fries are in her kid's meal!  I say, "Those are my fries!"  TO which she says, "That's okay, I don't mind, they WERE yummy."  The curly Q ate almost all of them....seriously.
6:05pm-We are home, I am quickly giving Marc the pass off. I ask him to have the kids clean the rooms, fold the laundry in the dryer (trying to salvage the plan to wake up with a orderly home) and help Phin with his Valentines.  I instruct him to make sure Phin writes them all, but to help him fold them and then tape stamps on top because they aren't allowed to bringing candy.
6:30-10pm- worship practice.  It was fun.  I love to sing.  I drive home, thinking, "well, that was a great way to end the craziness."  I should quit having thoughts.
10pm- I walk in the door and am chatting with Marc and I notice this:

"Why are the stamps still here, did you forget the Valentines?!"

He says, "No, we stamped them all."  
Seriously, I could not stop laughing and thinking I somehow woke up in an Amelia Bedelia book.  After I explain he said, "Oh!  I wondered why you bought so many stamps."

It was the perfect end to the day where few things went right and certainly wasn't the stress free day I planned.  It's a mixture of my brain farts and circumstances, but really, a mom who plans quiet time to herself should just know better.  If kids are involved, especially four of them, something's going awry.  Throw a husband and Hashimoto's in the mix and we are just happy we are all alive and laughing.  It's a crazy life, folks, and it's 100% mine.

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